Buddy canya spare a paradigm?

Sorry I aint been postin' nothin' fr a while. I had ta spend a little time inna pokey fr solicitin'. Can you believe that?? I said t' th' judge: "Honey, do I look like a freakin' solicitor??"

Well, apparently it was the whorin' they took exception to. Why they couldna jus' said that in the first place I don' know. I got busted while I was givin' Sheriff McClusky a little light relief. Then he says: "Honey, you're under arrest". Just like that. I said: "Sheriff, a gennleman woulda at least zipped his pants up first!"

I pointed out the injustice o' this t' th' judge. He said: "Ma'am, Sheriff McClusky was doin' it inna line o' duty". I said: "Waddaya think I was doin' it for, fun!?" I mean Sheriff McClusky aint no Brad Pitt, know waddimean? I said: "At least it is on my job description!" But my protests fell on stony ground an' I git a whole year inna pokey jus' fr givin' Sheriff McClusky a good time... well, and slammin' him inna puss, I guess. Kickin' th' judge inna pod prob'ly didn't help much either. He sure won't be round t'see me fr a while.

Anyway, I'm back on th' streets an' word is we gonna git us a whole new paradigm. I don' even know what a paradigm is but I jus' love gittin' new stuff!

Well, my friend, Cheryl says it's all to do with this 2012 thing. She says we gonna enter a new phase inna evolution o' mankind. I said: "Honey, that's gonna be a helluva New Year party!"

She says we gonna do away with th' monetary system an' we aint gonna have no government. I said: "Honey, I aint never had no monetary system an' th' only sign I ever see that we had a government inna first place is when congressmen call in t' th' ol' bordello fr a quick manifesto. Know waddimean?"

Cheryl says all that's gonna change. She says Mankind gonna git up off of his knees. Hmmm! Seems t' me that I been th' one on my knees while Mankind stands there gruntin' "Yeah baby! Ooh yeah!"

Cheryl says I'm gonna git up off of my knees too. I said: "Well, in that case, Honey, ya better git Mankind a box t' stand on 'cause I aint bendin' my back fr nobody!"

I sho' dunno where she gits her ideas from. She says we headin' fr a Noo Dawn. Well, I tellya, I only ever seen the Old dawn once... an' that was before bedtime. Know waddimean?

Th' way I see it is, if we gonna head into some Noo Paradigm, we gonna havta make a lotta changes. Guys gonna havta realise they got balls fr a reason apart from scratchin'. They gonna havta figure out that Life is somethin' y'LIVE, not somethin' y'win. An' they gonna havta improve their aim. I'm sick an' tired o' moppin' up round the john after 'em.

Guys gonna havta start gittin' they act together 'cause us gals been waitin' at the main entrance o' this Noo Paradigm since like forever, jus' waitin' fr 'em t'stop jerkin' around an' catch up.